Monday, July 29, 2013

The Bridge: How and Why we Pray

I went to grandfather mountain last week. On top of the mountain, there is a bridge called the Mile High Bridge. It is terrifying. They call it the mile high bridge because it is exactly one mile from sea level to the altitude of the bridge. One mile UP. There was a high wind on the afternoon that we walked across. A high wind, a swinging bridge, and me, trying not to look down.

When my babies were little and they cried in bed at night, I would immediately get up and get them whatever they needed. It was instinct. I didn't stop to think. But now my youngest will be nine in October. And sometimes, he will yell from his bed, "Hey, mom! Can I have a drink of water?" sometimes, I do just get it for him, but lately, I have taken to saying, "Sure, you can have a drink of water. Just get up and there is a glass in the bathroom."

"But I want you to get it for me. I'm tired."

"Well, I'm tired too," I say, and then the interaction doesn't get much better from there.

Now, you may think that I'm selfish and sometimes I truly am. But I also know that it would be better for Max to learn to do some things himself. I don't want him, at age 30, to roll over in bed and ask his spouse to get him a drink of water. I want him to be the kind of guy who offers to get her one.

Today, Jesus talks to us about praying. And he says some pretty insightful stuff. He tells a story of a man who is traveling at night. In Israel, especially during the hotter months, this kind of travel was not uncommon. The sand and heat were simply too much to bear during the day so a person was more comfortable traveling at night. And, of course, there were no drive-throughs or gas stations, so the traveler would eventually have to rely on the generosity of strangers in order to eat or rest.

A traveler arrives at the home of a local but the person has no food. So the local man comes to the door of a friends house and it is midnight. He has to ask his friend for bread in order to feed the stranger who has come to his house. Now many homes in Jesus' day were just one room. All cooking, cleaning, and sleeping were done in one space. So when the friend knocks at the door, he is waking up the man's entire family. But Jesus tells us that the friend must be persistent. He must keep knocking and if he does, eventually, the owner of the house will come out and feed him, if only just to get him to stop with the knocking.

So God will answer our prayers if we just keep asking. 

But most of us think of God as some kind of vending machine. If I pray for health and a successful career, then I should get what I ask for or something is not working, either God does not exist or God is not listening or God fundamentally does not care. If I ask for a drink of water, well then, God has better get me one and fast. And if God does not respond with speed, we figure that God is just not there.

In 1870, a creative engineer by the name of John Roebling dreamed of building a bridge that would connect New York to Long Island. All the engineers of his day thought he was crazy but John managed to convince his son Washington, also an engineer, to tackle the project with him. They hired a crew and began. After only a few months, there was a terrible accident on site and John was killed. His son, Washington, was severely injured and suffered brain damage. Washington could only move one finger. The rest of his body was paralyzed and he could not speak.

Engineers across the world criticized John and his son for tackling such a project. But Washington would not stop pursuing his fathers dream. He figured out how to communicate with his wife by tapping his finger on her arm. His wife listened with a kind of patience that was amazing. Using his direction, she rehired the crew and they continued the project. It took Washington 13 years of asking his wife to complete this and that detail until the bridge was finally finished in 1883. The Brooklyn Bridge stands today as a model of persistence, a tribute to a man and his father, two men who would not give up hope.

Jesus says Ask and your will receive. I looked up the koine Greek. It is a present imperative, which could also be loosely translated as keep on asking or keep on knocking or keep on seeking. Remember that God does not act like fast food. God is trying to develop a relationship with you. God is trying to build a bridge between you and the divine, so that you may know him. The purpose prayer is not to get what you want. The purpose of prayer is to come to know God.

Sometimes, we do get an answer and that answer is no.  If God does not do exactly what you asked for, it does not mean that you are not loved. Jesus asked God to take this cup away from him on the night before he was crucified. And God answered Jesus' prayer but the answer was NO. God did not take the cup from him. God asked him to suffer and die for us. And even now, two thousand years later, we are still discovering the nature of that kind of love and sacrifice. Gods answer had a perspective to it that would only be revealed years later. Though God answered no in that moment in the garden, his greater answer to Jesus and to all of us is yes. God is building something in you and for you, a bridge to the heart of the divine. And God wants you to pray constantly and for everything but with the understanding that God's answers sometimes take time to hear and understand. 

Next time to envision your prayer life, think of it more as a bridge than as a vending machine. And remember that there is a living being much more intelligent and loving than yourself on the other end of that bridge and that God can see things much more clearly, things present and things to come. The answers will come but the most important thing is that you build and fortify that bridge.