Last week, Nina Searcy, a faithful member of the Cathedral, brought in a book that she had written. It was a history of her family lineage. It took her many years to write. Together, we prayed a prayer of thanksgiving and blessed the book which is now in print.
My grandmother, before she died, wrote a memoir of her life. At the time, I wondered why she felt that this was so important. Now that she is gone, I am beginning to understand. Having the story of her life in print has been a gift to me. Because in some mysterious way, our family shapes us. And I am not just talking about our parents, grandparents and siblings, I am talking about our ancestry. We are shaped and formed by our family tree. It is part of who we are.
Family trees are becoming more and more popular, now that we can go online to ancestry.com and research our roots. I encourage all of you, no matter whether your childhood was stable or hurtful, to learn more about your ancestors. They can teach us about aspects of ourselves.
Back in the time of Jesus' birth, ancestry was even more important than it is today. Your net worth, what people thought of you, what tribe you were in in the house of Israel, all this was determined by your ancestry. People were not thought of as individuals so much as they were thought of as part of a whole lineage, an unbroken line of life. And if you came from a good heritage, your life was of value.
Joseph was from the family and lineage of King David, the most popular and greatest King of Israel. People would have known Joseph. He was a simple carpenter but people would have known his ancestry and he would have been respected and watched. Now this did not mean that all of Joseph's ancestors were good. They were not. One of his ancestors, King Ahaz, was one of the worst kings of Israel. The prophet Isaiah pleads with King Ahaz to ammend his ways, but the king instead builds a pagan altar in the Temple itself. So not all Josephs ancestors were good. But they were royal and they were respected.
Joseph is often overlooked in the Christmas story. He stands in the background. In all of the gospel accounts, he never actually speaks a word. By the time Jesus is grown, Joseph is gone, probably dead. The Bible uses one word is describing this man, this step-father of Jesus. The Bible says that Joseph was just.
It says in the gospel that "Mary was found to be with child." Did she tell Joseph herself? You better believe that in the small town of Nazareth, the news of Mary's pregnancy out of wedlock spread. And you'd better believe that people were talking badly about her. Women could be stoned to death for pregnancy outside of marriage. Joseph would have heard the gossip. He would have understood what people were saying. Her pregnancy would have shamed and humiliated him. It was an insult for her to have sex with someone else and before their marriage. But Joseph does not fly off the lid or even scream at her. He is wise and just. He tried to dismiss her quietly so as to save her life, but he wanted no part of a tainted woman. Until the angel appeared, Joseph believed the hype. And you can believe that EVERYBODY was talking.
And then an angel appeared to Joseph in a dream.
Let's really think about this. Joseph had a choice to make, a choice between what everyone in his town thought, the gossip, his reputation and what was told to him in a dream. In a dream! He had to choose whether to believe the gossip or to believe the good news about this young woman.
Gossip or Good News?
It is so easy for us to judge others. We talk badly about the decisions that other people make, about their behavior, their choices, the way they raise their children. It is so easy to sit back and criticise. Joseph must have know that to believe in Mary would mean that, for the rest of his life, people would whisper and gossip about who had his wife first. To take her as his wife was to accept her shame and share in it with her. It was to be the subject of gossip for the rest of his life. The ancestor of David takes a whore for a wife.
You are about to embark upon the Christmas holidays. You will be with family and friends and you will have free time. Lots of time to gossip and talk about each other. But each of us must make the same choice that Joseph made...Do we gossip or do we seek out and search for the good in others? Will you choose to dwell on the faults and mistakes of your relatives or will you strive to believe that they too are children of God and that there is something within each one of them that is worth praising, something that is worthy and good.
When the angel appeared to Joseph, the angel told him not to be afraid. I think that we talk badly about others mainly because we are afraid. It makes us feel more secure to gossip and criticize. It makes us feel that we must be doing something right, we must be at least better than those guys. It gives us a false sense of power. Seeing the good in others, searching out and actively seeking the good in others-now that takes energy and that takes courage.
There is this incredible scene in the movie A Beautiful Life. John Nash, the famous mathematician, suffers from skitzophrenia. He is so ill and so consumed with the people and voices that he hears that he pushes his wife and almost hurts his newborn baby boy. The doctor comes to the house and advises Nash's wife, Alicia, to commit him to an institution for life. Nash knows that if he is locked up there, he will never come out.
Nash sits on the bed in their bedroom. He looks completely deflated as he waits for his wife to make her decision. Will she lock him up for life?
Alicia enters their bedroom and kneels on the floor by the bed. She takes his face in her hands and this is what she says,
"I have to believe that something extraordinary is possible."
She decides to believe in the goodness and sanity that lies somewhere inside her husband. And they live together for the rest of their lives. When John Nash wins the Nobel Prize, she is right by his side.
If Joseph had believed what everyone was saying about Mary, Jesus might never have been born. Mary might have been stoned to death right there in her village. If Joseph had believed the hype and the bad news, the entire world would have looked a whole lot worse. If Joseph had cared about what people thought of him, no one would have remembered him at all. But Joseph chose to believe in the unlikely possibility that the angel was right, in the outrageous idea that this child was from God. He chose to believe in the truth of Mary's word and the possibility that something that looked scandalous might actually be the very best thing that ever happened to him. He chose to believe that something extraordinary was possible.
How do you view the world? Do you choose to see the good? Do you believe the angel of God when that angel tells you not to be afraid? Whatever you look for in this world, you will find it. Why not seek out the good?
