James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came forward to him and said to him, “Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you.” And he said to them, “What is it that you want me to do for you?” And they said to him, “Grant us to sit, one at your right hand and one at your left, in your glory.” But Jesus said to them, “You do not know what you are asking.”
Mark 10:35-38
I have always pictured James and John as big men. Maybe it is because of their fathers name, Zebedee. And they were called the Sons of Thunder, so they must have been powerful, the kind of men that make the earth shake when they walk. You can always hear them coming.
They were also ambitious, those brothers. They wanted to be the favorites, to sit in the places of highest honor when Jesus became King. Of course, they were anticipating an earthly kingship, and they could not wait to sit at his right and at his left for the kingly feast.
When they first approach Jesus with their ambitious desire, they attempt to play a trick on him. “Teacher, we want you to do whatever we ask of you.” How straightforwardly aggressive and how conniving! But Jesus will not be manipulated. He is so sharp! Despite exhaustion, constant travel, crowds, demands, Jesus does not skip a beat. He does not agree to do whatever they ask. He merely responds with his own question: “What is it that you want me to do for you?”
Seeing that Jesus cannot be tricked, they come out with it.
"We want to sit at your right hand and at your left in your glory."
Of course they do, wouldn’t we all?
Jesus does not get angry at their selfishness. He merely clarifies that they don’t know what they are asking. And he is right. They don’t have a clue.
When the disciples find out what James and John have requested, they are furious. Behaving exactly like a family, the disciples all secretly want to be the favorite. They all vie for attention from Jesus and all of them want to be first in line to be with him in his glory. The disciples are just like the rest of us, competitive and hungry for love.
What fascinates me is Jesus’ response: “You do not know what you are asking.” For years, I took this to mean that James and John were not able to follow in his footsteps, to complete the sacrifice that he would make. But I think that Jesus was saying more than just that. It is possible that he was also alluding to one of the mysteries of the Kingdom of Heaven.
You see, I do not believe that God has the same limitations that we do. Human beings can be intimate with two, maybe up to four people. We do not have the time, nor the emotional energy to make ourselves deeply aware of more that a few human companions. It is simply not possible.
But God does not have limitations when it comes to intimacy. In a metaphorical sense, God has more than one right hand and more than one left hand. The notion of competition, which pulses through all of creation from the lowest animals to the human race, does not exist in God. The Triune God is capable of holding each one of us in the most beloved position simultaneously.
Jesus goes on to teach James, John, and the disciples, that the way to come to God is to be last, to give up the good seat, to get your self out of the way. In a spectacularly paradoxical way, to be great means to get out of the race.
But getting our selves out of the way can be the hardest thing in the world to do. It goes against human nature to give up our seat at the table. The only way to learn this new way is to begin to listen to God and to give things away. The way of the cross is truly something that we do not understand, but we can take baby steps in that direction, trying to get ourselves off center stage. For that is the only way to the Kingdom of God.
